How to tell my child about an upcoming assessment

One of the most frequent questions I get from clients when they schedule an assessment is, "What do I tell my child?" It's only natural to have concerns about approaching the subject with them, especially since it is complicated to explain. This post offers some strategies to help you navigate this important conversation.

Tip 1: Understand the Assessment Yourself

Before talking to your child, ensure you have a clear understanding of what a psychoeducational assessment involves. Feel open to asking all your questions about the process, and potential outcomes of an assessment. Being informed can help to answer clearly any questions that may arise from your child.

Tip 2: The Simpler, the Better

It is best to speak to your child using a language level they can understand. For example, telling them that they are meeting with someone to figure out “how they learn best” can be a good way for them to understand the purpose of an assessment. You may even go further to tell them that they will be playing some games, answering questions and drawing pictures at the meeting.

Tip 3: Let the Child Feel in Control

With my assessments, children are encouraged to advocate for breaks with their parents or to use the washroom as they feel. It is important to let them know that they are free to take breaks and that they will actually enjoy a lot of what is involved with the assessment tasks. Helping a child to feel more control of a situation can often lead to greater confidence.

Tip 4: Use Positive Framing

Try to frame the assessment as an opportunity to learn more about their strengths and how they can best use them. You can also emphasize that everyone has strengths and challenges in life and that the assessment is a step towards a better understanding of their strengths and challenges.

Tip 5: Use Examples From Their Life

In describing assessments to children, I often first ask what their interests and hobbies are. In knowing a bit more about them I can better tailor my descriptions using related metaphors from their own experiences. For example, if a child likes hockey, I like saying that every hockey player has areas of strength and challenge in their hockey abilities and in a similar sense, learning assessments are looking at the same thing but with puzzles for learning.

Tip 6: Affirm Their Value Beyond Academics

It is important to remind your child that their worth is not tied to academic performance or the outcomes of the assessment. Reinforce your unconditional love and support, and that the assessment is simply a tool to help.

Tip 7: Reflect on Past Successes

We all live by the stories we tell ourselves from our past. Share examples of times when your child overcame challenges or learned something new about themselves. This can help them see the assessment as another opportunity for growth.

Tip 8: Plan a Nice Post-Assessment Activity

Arrange a fun or relaxing activity for after the assessment. It can even be as simple as going for ice cream after. This not only gives your child something to look forward to but also serves as a reminder that the assessment is just one part of their day and week.

Final Thoughts

By being open, supportive, and positive, you're setting the stage for a more relaxed and meaningful experience. If you have further concerns, feel free to reach out to me with questions about the assessment process.